If you’ve tried to quit porn by focusing only on behavior modification… but you keep ending up back in the same cycle, this video is for you.

In Matthew 12, Jesus gives a warning about “an empty house” — a life that has been cleaned up on the outside, but never truly filled with something greater.

A lot of recovery focuses on:

• blockers

• accountability

• discipline

• trying harder

But freedom is about more than removing darkness. You were not created merely to stop sinning. You were created to become someone new in Christ.

In this video, I walk through:

👉 why quitting porn isn’t enough

👉 how shame and isolation keep men stuck

👉 and 3 practical ways to start “furnishing the house” with truth, community, and purpose.

Freedom isn’t just about what you remove from your life.

It’s about what you fill it with.

The Only Framework You Need to Break Porn Addiction

If you’ve tried to quit porn and keep going back… it’s not because you’re weak. It’s because you’ve been working on the wrong things—or only part of the process.

In this video, I walk you through the 4C Framework (also known as the 4 Pillars of a Porn-Free Life)—the exact process I’ve used in my own life and now use to help others find real, lasting freedom.

Here’s what we cover:

👉 Crush the Shame — You stay stuck because you stay hidden

👉 Cultivate Community — You can’t heal in isolation

👉 Confront the Cause — Your behavior isn’t the root, it’s the fruit

👉 Commit to Change — Discipline works when it’s built on truth

Most people try to start with discipline… and that’s why nothing works.

Freedom starts by breaking shame, stepping into the light, and dealing with what’s actually underneath your behavior.

As a sex addict you likely tend to keep track of how many days it has been since you last looked a porn, masturbated, or acted out in some other way.

This often leads to increased shame (if it's been a short amount of time) or pride (if it's been longer). Both of which are bad and do not lead you to freedom.

New flash, God isn't keeping score of your sobriety date. He isn't concerned about whether you have a 1 week chip or a 30 day chip or a 1 year chip.

God is interested in Jesus' sobriety, his perfection, his work on your behalf. He wants you to look at Jesus and his life of good behavior. He wants you to rest on Jesus' performance for you and not on your performance for Him.

The pathway to freedom from sex addiction is aiming at progress in your recovery, not perfection. God isn't keeping score. Score keeping is another form of slavery.

So you are addicted to looking at porn? Can I ask you a serious question? I promise I'm not being sarcastic and I would like an honest answer.

Do you want to stop?

Of course you do, right? That's why you are reading this or stumbled on this video. But let me ask it another way. What do your actions say about your desires?

Sometimes our lack of change and our continued slavery to our our sexually unwanted behaviors or addiction is because we want sex more than we want our freedom.

I want us to have an honest conversation about what you really desire. It's time to choose, porn or freedom.

Additional Resources: Confessing Porn Struggles to Your Spouse: https://covenanteyes.sjv.io/JEka2

Videos Mentioned:

Masturbation a Sin? https://youtu.be/bejS8wL-Cw4

You Just Got Caught: Now What? https://youtu.be/vzVgz9AG26g

Do I have to tell my spouse (husband or wife) that I have been looking at porn? What about confessing having had an affair? Can anything good come from sharing my secret addiction with them? How will they respond? What will come of my marriage?

You have many questions, friend. I know. I talk with many asking the same questions. It is a scary thing to consider doing. I know. I've been there.

I want to help you understand 3 things as you consider confessing your sexual sin and acting out to your spouse.

If you are considering sharing your secret with your spouse, please watch this video first. This will help you know how to better think about this step and be best prepared to do it in a way that will serve your recovery.

Learn more & sign up for Covenant Eyes: https://covenanteyes.sjv.io/mAVz7

Be sure to use the promo code "SAC30" to get your first month FREE

When in recovery from porn addiction and sexually unwanted behaviors, using some sort of internet filtering can be a crucial part of your action plan.

Your lusts will eventually lead to looking for a way to satisfy them and an application like Covenant Eyes provides help to you in those moments of temptation.

However, it's possible that you SHOULD NOT use it.

Today I want to discuss with you 2 reasons that I think you SHOULD NOT use Covenant Eyes and then offer you 2 reasons that I think you SHOULD.

Confused? Let's chat today about sex addiction recovery and how internet monitoring software can potentially leave you stuck and also how it can be a big part of finding your freedom.

Video mentioned: A Porn Addict's Friend https://youtu.be/tEBrhsiy6EY

As a sex addicted Christian you have grown accustomed to a steady diet of porn and lust. You have trained the pallet of your desires to crave the very thing that is slowly killing you.

Many sex addicts have told me over the years that God just isn't satisfying enough for them to leave their addiction behind. But I say, how would you know? Your appetite for God is so dull because you are so used to ingesting porn. It's the reason we keep going back to McDonald's. Not because the food is necessarily and it certainly isn't good for us.

It's because we trained our tastes to want it. But if we were to STOP eating it, for a season, our tastes buds would actually change and we would start to experience healthy foods differently.

This is our aim in the 30 Days of No Sex Challenge. Single or married, I want you to consider giving up porn and all sexual experiences for 30 days. You need to starve yourself of the junk food and learn to feast on what is deeply satisfying.

This may just be th...

Often porn addicts make excuses for why that remain addicted. One excuse I hear often is just not knowing what to do.

Today I want to help you by eliminating that excuse. We are going to talk practical recovery steps for the sexually addicted.

When I was early in my recovery I learned The 3 (three) Circles when I was a part of the 12 (twelve) Step Program, Sexaholics Anonymous (SA). This simple guide was extremely helpful is thinking clearly about what I should and should not be doing.

It is time to take a step towards freedom. Join me in today's discussion and create your very own 3 Circles to guide you towards sobriety.

What do we have in common with Big Ben Roethisberger in regard to our own sexual brokenness?

This past week Big Ben shared about his porn addiction at a speaking event and shared some of his story.

In this week's video I want to share with you the 3 things that God has taught me through my own struggles with lust and porn addiction.

Our stories don't have to end with sexual brokenness. God wants to redeem our stories. Join me as we take a longer look at this redemption.

Are you continuing to give into your temptations to look at porn? Is it impossible for you to not act out sexually every time your addiction calls?

In this video I want to discuss 3 things that I have learned in my journey to freedom from sex addiction when it comes to not giving into temptation.

Lustful temptations can feel like a kryptonite in the moments when they come and we rarely win the battle. Pornography, escorts, massage parlors, girlfriends or boyfriends, or any number other things call out to us and we are lured into its seductive trance.

That's over now. You don't have to lose the temptation battle anymore.

Link mentioned in this video: Porn Is Not Your Problem